after hours

and here is how i ENDED my friday night . . .

as i was putting on my coat to leave the bar, a very ambitious guy with a "bum" leg and a crutch tried out his sob story on a friend of mine. i wasn't so interested. five minutes later we ran into him outside. with no crutch. walking just fine. soooooprise, sooooprise!

we proceeded to walk home with my neighbor ken and got to our corner. we stood to talk. being stationary in new york is fertile ground for observations.

we'd been standing there but 30 seconds when i saw, crossing the street, someone i work with. Gross-Out Greenberg. ew. this man gives new definition to the term "bad hygiene." and "creepy." and he was crossing MY street in the middle of the night!? he was carrying a bunch of plastic bags. i deduced they probably contained body parts. sadly, no one seemed surprised by that suspicion.

shortly thereafter, a man approached us asking to point toward 7th ave. the three of us each pointed in different directions. our arms literally slapping and overlapping one another. each correct mind you - as this is the west village and everything is a giant loop. about a minute passed and an underage bridge and tunnel crowd drunkenly stumbled upon us, "um do youuu guys liiiiive arouuund hhheeeerree?" again with the directions.

we saw a woman walking her two beautiful dobermans. but what caught our eye? one of the dogs was carrying the shopping bag . . . hmm i THINK it was a shopping bag. i mean. unlike Gross-Out Greenberg, I'm certain there were no body parts being toted. but it is just NOW occurring to me that perhaps this pup was cleaning up after himself. carrying his own mess. his little poo-bag. hmm. interesting.

the three of us finally parted ways.

i indulged in my new obsession. carl lewis's scary ass acting reel (http://www.carllewis.com/). i guess i felt like having nightmares. or a good laugh. or a lobotomy.

i fell asleep.

shortly thereafter i was woken up by my phone ringing. it was my best friend calling from north carolina. he was driving home from a night out. we talked for a bit. but our conversation ended when he'd safely arrived home.

and i found myself advising - no! insisting! "yes. go back to your car. don't leave that girl sleeping in your backseat."